The Wrapping-Paper Realization
by Irvine Nugent
I’ll be honest: wrapping gifts and I have never had a healthy relationship.
Some people find it soothing… almost therapeutic.
I find it about as relaxing as assembling IKEA furniture without instructions.
So there I was the other night, determined to wrap just one gift—one—before giving up and switching to gift bags, humanity’s greatest invention. Within minutes, the scene had devolved into chaos: paper curling like it was trying to escape, tape sticking to everything except the paper, scissors disappearing as if on cue.
At one point, I stepped back to assess the situation.
The box I had wrapped resembled a soft-shelled crab—
lumpy, uneven, and vaguely ashamed of itself.
And here’s the funny thing: in that moment of frustration, I caught myself thinking,
“Why does this bother me so much?”
And the answer wasn’t about the paper.
It was about perfection.
About expectations.
About the quiet pressure we feel—especially this time of year—to get things “right,” make things look effortless, and present a polished version of ourselves to the world.
The wrapping paper wasn’t the problem.
My reaction to it was the real story.
And the more I thought about it, the more I realized this is true of most tension in our lives:
Tension doesn’t show up because we’re doing something wrong.
It shows up because something important is happening inside us.
Frustration reveals where we care.
Impatience reveals our limits.
Annoyance reveals the gap between how we want things to be and how they actually are.
The very emotions we try to avoid—especially during the holidays—often contain the information we need most.
Instead of resisting moments of tension, try this:
When you feel yourself tightening up, ask:
“What is this moment trying to tell me?”
It might be pointing to a value.
A boundary.
A story you’re holding.
Or simply that you’re doing too much, too quickly, with too little grace for yourself.
Sometimes the mess is the message.
A Holiday Wish for You
May your holidays be joyful, restorative, and full of grace—
especially grace for yourself.
May your tension point you toward what matters,
may your expectations be flexible,
and may all your gifts—no matter how they look—
be received with the love that truly wraps them.